Was it there before?

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A few short weeks after I left my husband, I was sitting in a Relief Society lesson about the "The Family: A Proclamation to the World." I wept silently over my shattered dreams. Over simple phrases like "... the family is central to the Creator's plan ..." and "... husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other ..." I thought of my little children -- one sitting in the primary room next-door and one pitter-pattering through the hallway with grandpa in tow -- and about their father, hundreds of miles across the country from us. And my heart broke for the millionth time. As the lesson stretched on, I stared absently at the blue confetti carpet, fighting the urge to rise from my seat and burst out the door. And then suddenly, my ears perked up as one of the sisters began reading the second-to-last paragraph:

"We warn that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets."

Wow! Holy moly, I thought, was that really in there before? I can tell you, I've never heard it like that before. It just goes to show, the word of God really is eternal. It's such a miracle really. Because the words of the prophets can mean something different to each individual -- to you or to me. But they can also mean something different just to me depending on what phase of life I am in. For instance, when President Hinckley first read the Family Proclamation in 1995, I was only 15 years old. Now, 17 years later, as (an almost) single mother of two, I hear the words so differently.

As I've pondered my experience in that lesson that day, I no longer feel as much despair as I did months ago. Instead, as I've moved forward a little bit on my path, I have a bit more perspective. I've gathered a little more courage, and I have more hope. Sure, I have sad days. I even cry sometimes. And I am often weary. But I know I will not be in this phase of life forever. My children will grow, and so will I. At the very least, I am a mother in Zion, and I have an important work to do. Besides ... Who knows what the Family Proclamation will be saying to me 15 years from now?